Better Days, Now I Need Better Nights

Since becoming an adult I've gone through periods of insomnia. I'm usually up for an hour or so in the middle of the night each night, but some night, like last night are a true struggle. I started out in the bedroom and gave up after about an hour. Then I came to the living room and tried to sleep on the couch. That worked for an hour or two and then I woke up after yet another bad dream. I know I'm under stress with everything which is why I'm having bad dreams. Then I went back to the bedroom and read for about an hour. After reading, I couldn't shut my mind off so back out to the living room/couch I went. I turned on the "ocean waves" white noise I have on my phone and was eventually able to fall asleep. Still got up around 5am and didn't go back to sleep like I had planned. Surprisingly I'm not as tired today as I thought I might be, but I don't want my body to get used to this. I've used Tylenol PM or NyQuil Sleep in the past to help me sleep, but then I end up feeling groggy the next day and my dreams tend to be even more vivid and also very bad.

The ocean waves white noise is nice. I can close my eyes and be back on a cruise ship balcony sleeping under the stars while the ship floats to it's next destination.

I've always loved the water, guess it makes sense now that I want to be a captain. Also helped me think that my end of the year vacation should be a cruise. Or it needs to be someplace where I can be near the water or hear the waves.

Still no response from the mechanic. He was closed between Christmas and New Year's so I'm sure he's backed up. I'm trying to be patient, but I really need the car fixed so I can start making money again. I'll give him until tomorrow afternoon and then I'll probably have to go somewhere else.

Focusing on the positive today, I did read, I did clean, and I did blog.

So here's to a restful night.

Drinking Water is a Challenge for Me

When I was growing up, you drank when you were thirsty. From the sink, from the hose, from a glass of water your Mom gave you to put next to your bed, or from the bubbler (drinking fountain) at school. Now water is everywhere. In fact, beverages are everywhere. You can't go to the grocery store without sipping on something. Even the carts have cup holders in them. At the jobs I've held in the past, they give you a cup when you start so you can always have something to drink at your desk during the day.

This is a problem with me. I tend to get busy at work and forget to drink my large cup of water. Or I'm doing something during the day or cooking or whatever and I don't carry a bottle with me everywhere. I find that I am able to make it through grocery shopping without coffee, or water, or gatorade. I find that I can travel short distances without having a drink in my car.

As I've gotten older I've developed some problems with kidney stones and needed surgery twice to remove them. Part of that comes from not drinking enough water. My urologist says that my goal, is to have constantly clear pee. So I'm trying. I have bottles of water that I refill from the tap and drink and if I feel a little tinge of pain in my flanks, I down a gallon of water. But I still don't drink enough. The stubborn in me says I shouldn't do what they say, I'm an adult, I can handle it. Don't tell me what to do. But in order to be healthier and to help lose weight, I'm supposed to drink water...ALL THE TIME.

I hardly drink alcohol, so drinking water shouldn't be that big of a deal. I've even tried getting into "sparkling water" so I don't miss soda so much, but I don't like that either. I've added citrus slices to my water to try and make it fancy or more interesting. Nope. I drink it, but it's not a big deal. I don't have a glass of water next to my bed at night. I don't get up in the morning and down a bottle of water or two, although I suppose I should.

So, as part of my fitness challenge I am challenging myself to drink more water. For me, it's almost harder than exercise.

30 Day Writing Challenge--Day 2--Your Earliest Memory

My earliest memory? How do I know it's my earliest? I mean, when I saw this topic, a whole bunch of memories came flooding back to my childhood. But how do I know which one was the first? It's all kind of a blur of back then. Some of it has to be from stories passed down by my parents and grandparents, but does that mean it's MY memory or one of theirs? My boyfriend always complains that I never forget anything, but I've noticed as I'm getting older, that I do tend to forget things.

The memory that keeps flooding back to me though is the one where I was with my mother and brother at a friend's swimming pool. I was probably 3 or 4. I was riding on my mom's back, like a baby koala, when I slipped off and went under water. I remember blowing all sorts of bubbles and I'm sure the adults all panicked, but when I was lifted up and out of the pool I remember saying "Did you see all the bubbles?" Maybe that's my mind's way of coping with what was probably a scary experience for everyone else, and maybe even for me, but I remember it as pleasant. Perhaps that's why today, still, water grounds and soothes me. I've always loved swimming and being near waves, whether it's a lake or an ocean. I feel most at peace after taking a cruise so water plays an important part of my life.

That's the real first vivid memory, I have. I can remember the pool, I can remember the feel of my mom's skin and I definitely remember the bubbles. I've gone under water a lot of times. Another memory of going underneath in a pool was when we were living in New Mexico...my brother and I had gotten Chiquita boogie boards at a soccer game as a promotional gift. I was using one on my back (vertically) and my legs were over the other one (horizontally). My mother mentioned, whispered actually,  something about Haagen-Dazs ice cream, and I said... "Haagen-Dazs?" and the board behind my back shot out like a rocket, and I went under with my legs still over the other board, like a ledge. I remember laughing at that point too, and when I righted myself, everyone was laughing. Probably a happier memory for my mom than when I was 3 or 4, but similar in my mind.